Having got up at ungodly o'clock to leave Exeter, we made it to Heathrow in good time. We got checked in and through security with pretty little fuss, the usual slow-slow-hurry-hurry-slowly routine. As usual I picked the shortest queue with the most indecisive punters and rudest staff. The lovely clear plastic wash bag full of lovely calming flight yummies to keep me hydrated, wrinkle free and glamorous had to be roughly and hastily decanted into two plastic bags as it "didn't comply" with regulations, although considering it just get thrown in a tray and xrayed with no one actually physically looking at it I'm not sure I'll bother asking next time and just chance it. The shoes had to be off and then suddenly they didn't as one was on and the other in my hand hopping around trying to get it back on again whilst being glared at by Miss Trunchbull working the conveyor - "get your iPad out, sure you haven't got anymore liquids, what's in your pockets". I managed to set off the alarm but after a body scan no apparent reason was found. Adrian got the usual cursory pat down
The joys of security behind us a cafe Breakfast followed, expensive but filling, after a busy morning. A quick bit of last minute.com shopping (ibuprofen and water for me) and we were ready for boarding. We were sandwiched in rows between young children which filled me with slight trepidation but other than the usual squawking during take off and landing the crying was kept to a minimum. The large array of Films was impressive but I chuckled to see that the "classic" selection included nothing older than the last 10 years. We were fed well although the frequency of the meals and the generosity of the alcohol has changed somewhat since my first Qantas flight to Oz just over 20 years ago (yes I'm really old now). I seem to remember the nice trolley dolly on that flight stocking me up with booze so that they didn't have to come around so often. This time we only got offered drinks with one meal. Having lucked out on our request to use the business class toilet because it's larger (a soon learnt trick from my travels with JoLt) we met the new super disabled toilet arrangements - so they have basically adapted the doors to make a corridor with three toilets convert into a larger cubicle for one of them but prevents easy access to the other two toilets. After the third or fourth trip we got quite proficient at it but why is it that turbulence always hit whenever you're in the loo? This is potentially hard when you're alone sat on the loo but when you're in a cubicle with someone else and an aisle chair turning your face to the wall with nothing to hold onto it can be more than a little disconcerting!
We arrived intact in Dubai for an extremely brief stopover, we were escorted/pushed to the special needs lounge which was in the opposite direction to our Gate. I managed a quick wash and brush up and a change of undies but was berated for taking too long as we needed to get yo our plane (I thought 10 minutes was pretty good for a quick pee, wet wipe wash, hair brush and General tidy up!!). We were accompanied to the Gate by Daniel a young lad half way through his 12 hour shift, he came from from Pakistan and was in Dubai to earn some money to send home to his family. He pushed on at pace whilst I almost jogged to keep up. Our Second flight was 5 hours longer, although I fought to stay awake to catch up with the approaching time zone, I failed miserably and missed food. With multiple micro sleeps I ended up watching the same film over and over a bit like ground hog day. The film in question, Snatched, was vaguely funny but really not worth replaying 10 times in order to finish it. Although the experience was only enhanced by the two year old in the seat behind kicking me in the back for half the flight.
We finally emerged from Melbourne airport after a flurry of messages pinging onto the newly turned on mobiles to emerge laden with luggage to find the Hotel shuttle to realise pretty quickly that there was no way that that Adrian was going to be able to get in despite the obvious embarrassment of the driver. So once more back towards the arrivals point and onto the Taxi queue, awaiting a maxi taxi. We waited as several suitable Commodores (like an old Ford Granada estate for those of you you not familiar with the joy of the "Commode") picked up others- knowing we could easily grab one and throw the chair in the back but also knowing that taxi driver can be doing with wheelchairs in their boots, we had to wait for our especially ordered taxi. Gazumped to the first maxi by a large (in number rather than girth) Indian family who arrived well after us, I challenged the queue jumping but the driver insisted our taxi wax"just coming". It was but my first instinct that we should have just walked to the hotel was spot on, after about 3 mins in the cab watching the fare raise as wheelchair was tied down safer than the Crown Jewels. Nice man from hotel shuttle helped us in with luggage and taxi driver annoyed that he'd queued for an hour and a half to take us less than half a mile (would've walked if I'd known!!). He said we could pay him what ever we thought so we gave him $10 (90 cents less than the charge but didn't want to break into a second $10 note. Nice enough hotel and slept ok considering the time delay and a shared Queen size bed.
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